The Kia Inquiry
Hatoist protests near the Kimmilian Book Shop, named in mock of Kim Jong-Il.DATELINE -- Seoul. The populous religion of Hatoism, a sacrificial group, has declared an Anhyro (equivalent of the Muslim Jihad) against Kia Nation. The Hatoist leader of Kia Nation, Fam Sal-Yu, a former statesman, issued the news of the Anhyro to the public yesterday. "...our human sacrifices have been controlled and are sacred. We will not become criminals because of our religion. Kia Nation expresses freedom of religion. It's about time they stand behind it..." Some Hatoists have converted to "less sacrificial" religions. However, several who have converted have been killed. "These defectors' minds have been plagued by the government's ill use of logic. Their minds must be freed. Their body limits them, Hato taught us. Hato taught us to think beyond our limits. These people have defied Hato. Freeing them in sacrifice is the only way to keep them from being savaged by the world." Fam Sal-Yu was arrested today on counts of conspired murder, mass murder, and attempt to conspire. His successor in the leadership of Hatoism in Kia Nation is among three mean: Yao Muzzo, priest of the Pyongyang Center of Spiritual Freedom, Yong Chil, priest of the Seoul Plantation of Mind, and Fam Sal-Chong, his brother who served with him in the Seoul Center of Mind and Spirit.
