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News: The counter-revolution will soon be as dead as the Q Society!

Author Topic: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........  (Read 1390 times)

Offline kor

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Like the title says. Enjoy.


1. THINGY (thing-ee)
...For the Female: Any part under a car hood.
...For the Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-NE-Ra-bel)
...For the Female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
...For the Male: Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-in-Kay-shon)
...For the Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
...For the Male: Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment)
...For the Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
...For the Male: Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment)
...For the Female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
...For the Male: Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens)
...For the Female: An Embarrassing byproduct of digestion.
...For the Male: A source of entertainment, self-expression, and male bonding.

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv)
...For the Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
...For the Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (RI-moht kon-trohl)
...For the Female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
...For the Male: A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.



Offline Allama

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #1 on: July 13, 2007, 02:29:24 PM »
9. INTIMACY
...For the Female: A strong experience of closeness with a partner, bordering on "oneness".
...For the Male: Wait, we're talking about sex, right?

Offline Myroria

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #2 on: July 13, 2007, 07:13:36 PM »
10. Bitching:

Male: What women do 24 hours of the day.
Female: What any woman but me does 24 hours of the day.
"I assure you -- I will be quite content to be a mere mortal again, dedicated to my own amusements."

Offline Khablan

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #3 on: July 13, 2007, 07:58:23 PM »
Salad:
For the female.. a nice light healthy lunch, with dressing on the side, please.
For the male... stuff that rabbits and females eat.

Potato:
For the female... versatile vegetable that can be prepared any number of ways.
For the male... what you put on the plate as garnish for the MEAT

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Offline Eientei

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2007, 10:31:33 PM »
VEAL

Female: A meat produced from calves that have been wrongfully raised in stressful and abusive conditions solely for human consumption.

Male: "I'll have the veal marsala."

Offline Tacolicious

  • Your Friendly Neighborhood Tacoman
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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #5 on: July 14, 2007, 12:01:17 AM »
Salad:
For the female.. a nice light healthy lunch, with dressing on the side, please.
For the male... stuff that rabbits and females eat.

Potato:
For the female... versatile vegetable that can be prepared any number of ways.
For the male... what you put on the plate as garnish for the MEAT

I love being an exception to most "male" things  :D Taco, A progressive meal
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"Nothing is fun when you have to do it, that's why you don't see a lot of old whores giggling over sex"


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Offline Bara

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #6 on: July 14, 2007, 01:44:21 AM »
Video Games

Males: Fun...

Females: A great way to deistract guys.
Bara, King of Spam, Slayer of Spelling, Vanquisher of Grammar.

Offline Tacolicious

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #7 on: July 14, 2007, 01:53:35 AM »
Makeup

Males: A confusing jumble of weird looking powders, pencils and crayons that shall never be understood and is best left alone

Females: No friggin' idea.... Females? Little help?
http://www.nationstates.net/wheresoever

"Reality is an illusion albeit a persistant one"
"Wisest is he who knows he is not wise"
"Nothing is fun when you have to do it, that's why you don't see a lot of old whores giggling over sex"


Delicious Comrade of the most Awesome Party

Offline Khablan

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #8 on: July 14, 2007, 03:33:17 AM »
Makeup:
Female... A collection of powders and lotions for the purpose of enhancing natural beauty, which is somewhat necessary both in business and in impressing the opposite gender.
Male... What takes females an hour to do before we can go anywhere.
For all the news, check out our Community Office!

Got questions?  We got answers!  Come see our Information Section!

Official welcome wagon of Taijitu, Co-Minister of Community and Recruitment. Taijitu's ambassador to TWP, Madre Califidrix of the Order of Gryphons. 

Also unofficial forum mom - provider of various sources of solace for the soul, including but not limited to cookies, hugs, and hot cocoa.


Offline Khem

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #9 on: July 14, 2007, 04:59:02 AM »
BAKING

Women: an enjoyable culinary activity in which you make comfort food. quite good to do when upset.

Men: something women do that makes the kichen off limits but produces some killer junk food.

Peoples Confederation of Holy Isles of al'Khem
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Offline Khablan

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #10 on: July 14, 2007, 06:27:59 AM »
SCREWDRIVER:

Male...  One of a set that includes Phillips and straight-heads in various sizes, because there is a correct tool for every job.
Female... A tool in the junk drawer that's handy for chopping at ice and unlocking doors that your kid somehow locked.  Screws?  You use a butterknife for that, because there's never a screwdriver handy when you need one.
For all the news, check out our Community Office!

Got questions?  We got answers!  Come see our Information Section!

Official welcome wagon of Taijitu, Co-Minister of Community and Recruitment. Taijitu's ambassador to TWP, Madre Califidrix of the Order of Gryphons. 

Also unofficial forum mom - provider of various sources of solace for the soul, including but not limited to cookies, hugs, and hot cocoa.


Offline Khem

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #11 on: July 14, 2007, 08:36:22 AM »
THEATRE

Men: something my (wife/girlfriend/mother) drags me to. a good place for a nap.

Women: a place for moving and thought provoking pieces of art, acted out by talented or not so talented indeviduals.

Peoples Confederation of Holy Isles of al'Khem
:tai: Persona :tai: Worldbuilding Guide :tai: Nation of al'Khem :tai:

Offline Trey

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #12 on: July 16, 2007, 08:04:03 PM »
THEATRE

Men: something my (wife/girlfriend/mother) drags me to. a good place for a nap.

Women: a place for moving and thought provoking pieces of art, acted out by talented or not so talented indeviduals.

Hey, I'm a straight male who likes theatre, for most of the same reasons mentioned above.  As for the others, though...yeah, pretty much.
"I believe every single person is extraordinary. The tragedy is that we
have a society where too many people never get to fulfill that
extraordinary potential. My view – the liberal view – is that
government’s job is to help them to do it. Not to tell people how to
live their lives. But to make their choices possible, to release their
potential, no matter who they are. The way to do that is to take power away from those who hoard it. To challenge vested interests. To break down privilege. To clear out the bottlenecks in our society that block opportunity and block progress. And so give everyone a chance to live the life they want." - Nick Clegg, Leader of the Liberal Democrats and Deputy Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

Offline Eientei

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #13 on: July 16, 2007, 09:10:38 PM »
THEATRE

Men: something my (wife/girlfriend/mother) drags me to. a good place for a nap.

Women: a place for moving and thought provoking pieces of art, acted out by talented or not so talented indeviduals.

Hey, I'm a straight male who likes theatre, for most of the same reasons mentioned above.  As for the others, though...yeah, pretty much.

I'll admit that I can't stand most musicals, but I generally feel the same way about it.  I'm also not a "sit on the couch with a beer and watch the game" sort of guy, with a few exceptions.  So true about the makeup, though.

Offline Trey

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Re: Men and Women Aren't Always Speaking the Same Language..........
« Reply #14 on: July 16, 2007, 09:45:29 PM »
[quote author=Eientei link=topic=2344.msg65902#msg65902 date=1184620238
I'll admit that I can't stand most musicals, but I generally feel the same way about it.  I'm also not a "sit on the couch with a beer and watch the game" sort of guy, with a few exceptions.  So true about the makeup, though.
[/quote]

I can even deal with most musicals.  RENT was spectacular, Little Women was passable, The Lion King was stunning, and, though I've only listened to the soundtracks, Avenue Q and Spamalot seem hilarious.  Also, as a self professed sports fanatic, I'm just fine with sitting with my friends on the couch and watching a game.  Alcohol...probably only if we're losing.
"I believe every single person is extraordinary. The tragedy is that we
have a society where too many people never get to fulfill that
extraordinary potential. My view – the liberal view – is that
government’s job is to help them to do it. Not to tell people how to
live their lives. But to make their choices possible, to release their
potential, no matter who they are. The way to do that is to take power away from those who hoard it. To challenge vested interests. To break down privilege. To clear out the bottlenecks in our society that block opportunity and block progress. And so give everyone a chance to live the life they want." - Nick Clegg, Leader of the Liberal Democrats and Deputy Prime Minister of the United Kingdom