-- If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple
of car payments.
-- Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead
of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either.
Just leave me the hell alone.
-- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt
and a leaky tire.
-- It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal
the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
-- It's a small world. So you gotta use your elbows a lot.
-- Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any.
-- We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.
-- No one is listening until you make a mistake.
-- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
-- Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
-- It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve
as a warning to others.
-- It is far more impressive when others discover your good
qualities without your help.
-- If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
-- If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again; it was
probably worth it.
-- If you haven't much education you must use your brain.
-- You can't strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
-- When someone says, "Do you want my opinion?" - it's always a
negative one.
-- The word listen contains the same letters as the word silent.
-- The trouble with work is - it's so daily.
-- The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that
little extra.
-- Scientists say 1 out of every 4 people is crazy. Check 3
friends, if they are OK, you're it.
-- Pain and suffering are inevitable but misery is optional.
-- Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like
clearing the drive before it has stopped snowing.
